Meeting a Dutchman in Shanghai

I’d only been in China for three weeks when my friends and I headed to Shanghai. (from Chengdu – it’s in the Sichuan province) I was still experiencing some extreme culture shock and on top of that, my friends, while sweet and very generous, lead a rather quiet life. Every evening was virtually the same -- go to dinner and head home by 9pm. I’m a night owl, so after several weeks of this sedate lifestyle, I was getting a little stir crazy. Okay, a lot stir crazy. I mainly entertained myself by taking long walks around the city, just soaking up Chinese life and culture.

I was hoping Shanghai would be different, but the routine stayed the same. So, the walks continued. One night after dinner, I was wandering close to our apartment when I saw two Westerners – two young guys to be exact -- walking towards me on the street. (not exactly an odd occurrence in Shanghai, but still, something to notice) When they were just about to pass by me, I stopped them on impulse by saying "I’ll pay you guys a thousand dollars if you speak English to me." They laughed and stopped to talk with me, even though neither one spoke English as their first language. (those smart Europeans with all their languages…) They told me they were engineers and they were in Shanghai for a conference. I told them I was a bored American desperate for some fun. While we’re chatting I realize "Hmmm… the Dutch guy here is cute. Good job, Ang! Way to accost good-looking strangers!" (pat on the back) Anyhoo, we exchanged numbers and emails and they told me they’d call on Tuesday night (it was now Sunday) to go out.
The next day, I’m wandering around – again – when I see the Dutchman walking towards me. This time he’s in a suit. Yowza! Wow… he IS cute! We chat for a few seconds – he’s about to give his conference presentation – and we go our separate ways.

The next night I’m whiling a few hours away in an internet café when Karsten (the other guy) calls to tell me a few of them are headed out for the night. Do I want to come along? Yes! Yes! Please save me from this boredom. (But please oh please… tell me the Dutchman will be there too.)
When I walk into Karsten’s hotel, I see him and some other guy standing there that I don’t know. Er… um… where’s Martijn? (btw: the Dutchman does have a name) But before I can worry, he walks into the hotel and greets me with three kisses. (It’s 3 in the Netherlands. Who knew?)
Okay, I realize I’m getting longwinded here, so I’ll cut to the chase. We had a great night out in Shanghai… drinking… dancing… staying out until the sun was up. Two nights later, Martijn and I go out again – walking around Shanghai, talking and drinking in a cozy little bar. We decide to spend the whole next day – our last – together. Again, it’s fantastic. The next day, he goes home to the Netherlands. I fly to Beijing to meet a friend.

Within 5 days, I invite him back to China for his upcoming holiday. He accepts.

One month later – and about a million emails and IM sessions later – he arrives in Beijing.

By this time, I’m already a little in love with him.

A week into his visit, I know I love him (a lot more than just a little), but I’m afraid to tell him.

A week and a half later, we’re already talking about this relationship becoming more than just a holiday fling.

By the end of July, he’s back home in the Netherlands and he’s asked me to come live with him. (the only logical choice since he’s in the middle of a PhD program)

By August 15th, I’m back in the States and I’ve accepted.

I know it sounds crazy, but I also know it feels right.

And I know I would regret it very much if I didn’t go and take the chance.