"Beijing is starting to feel like home"

Hello my loved ones! (and those of you I just merely tolerate... :)

My apologies for the long absence from these updates. I don't have a very good excuse other than I've been simply getting myself settled into Beijing. You'll be happy to know that I now have a place to live and I'm working on being gainfully employed. While I'm now "certified" to teach English classes for my friend's company, I don't exactly have a regular teaching gig set up yet. I'm hoping that will come through this week. (but still... maybe you want to think about getting that couch ready for me, just in case...)

But don't worry (mom... i know you... you're worrying...) I also have an interview with CCTV on Monday. CCTV is the gigantic, government-run television company over here. And no, I haven't managed to learn mandarin that fast -- they also have an English language channel. My friend Hogan took me there for a little meet and greet and they were rather excited by my resume. So... I'll go in Monday and take a copy-writing test and a screen test. Yes, that's right. They may actually put my mug on camera. If that happens, then I could become a bit of a celebrity over here. I kid you not. Really... there still aren't a huge number of channels, so if you're on TV at all, people get to know your face. And since my face is just a tad different than others in China, I would certainly stick out. Anyhoo... keep your fingers crossed for me. (You know, 'cause you don't want me as a houseguest... I'm messy and I'll eat all of your food.)

I can't believe it, but China is starting to feel normal to me. However... I think I can still put together a fun list of "weird cultural differences" for you to enjoy. Here goes:

1) If you come to China and decide to fly around to different cities, beware. Just because your ticket says you're flight is leaving from gate 24, that doesn't exactly mean it will ULTIMATELY leave from gate 24. Now, imagine you're me. First of all, you're a fairly clueless person by nature anyway. Add to that that you don't speak Mandarin. (though, by god, you do need to learn those numbers pretty fast or else you will miss every flight) You find your gate, you cram yourself into a tiny little Asian-person sized chair between an old lady clutching a gigantic, plastic bag and a middle-aged man who's... well... just staring at you. You keep checking the board, making sure you're flight hasn't left without you because it's already 5:30pm and you were supposed to leave at 5pm. No... it's still here. But, all of a sudden you realize: hey... they changed the gate on me! Wait?! Was that that last announcement? The didn't do the English translation! arrrgggghhhhh. You grab your stuff and sprint for gate 41. Ah ha! Sure enough, the flight to Beijing is now going out of this gate. You relax. You think it'll all be okay. You idly glance up at the board one last time and realize... oh my god, the gate has changed yet again! You run back down the stairs to find your new gate and, there they are -- 150 Chinese people boarding your flight to Beijing. How did they know? Why didn't they run to the other gate? I am convinced it was some sort of conspiracy against the clueless white girl. I'm sure I saw that little old lady laughing at me....

2) Last night at dinner, I was paid a compliment by a Chinese woman. She said "oh, you must have been very beautiful ten years ago." Now, I ask you: does THIS sound like a compliment to you? When this little gem was translated to me, I looked at the translator in absolute horror. Huh? Excuse me, I must have misunderstood. Could you say that again? My friend assured me that in China, this is a nice thing to say. See... I'm supposed to accept that I'm old here and take the compliment for what it is. I'm now simply the remains of what was once a fine-looking woman. Gee... okay... since you put it THAT way. But it's okay, I repaid the compliment. I said "oh thank you and you would be skinny if it wasn't for your big, fat, as*." I assured her that this was a very nice thing to say in the States... :)

3) Tonight, I had an ear massage and it was a little slice of heaven. I know it sounds bizarre, but it's the same premise as acupuncture and foot massages. There are pressure points in your ears and when they're manipulated, it relaxes different parts of the body. Now, I understand why we all die of heart attacks and Asian people live until their 100. They take relaxation very seriously.

4) MSG is tasty. While we're advertising that our foods contain "No MSG", the Chinese are dumping loads of the stuff into everything they eat. It's a flavor enhancer and they're name for it, which is pronounced way-jeen, literally means something like "yummy stuff." And really, it's hard to escape it here, so if the stuff messes you up, you'll be eating a lot of... um... watermelon if you visit China.

5) About the 1 couple, 1 child policy. While it's still in effect, you can have more than one child if you pay some money to the government. However, that's not the interesting thing I learned. There's the concept of 4-2-1 in China. Sure... you may only have one child, but there are 4 grandparents and 2 parents who are utterly and completely committed to making sure that one child is successful. So, these kids have everything. English lessons (very expensive), good clothes, education abroad, etc. etc. It's more than simply grandma and grandpa spoiling the kids. They see it as their duty to help financially support their grandchild.

6) The Gobi desert is advancing rapidly and it's a big problem for Beijing. (and the rest of China) I don't know the exact number, but the desert gets closer -- a lot closer -- to Beijing every year. Case in point: The desert expanded something like half the size of Pennsylvania in just five years. Eek. And it's strange... after being in Chengdu and Shanghai, I can definately tell that Beijing has desert close by. You can even see dust in the air and on the streets. I think the Gobi is only like 100 miles away from Beijing right now which makes me wonder: what will the situation be like for the 2008 Olympics? Maybe they'll just need to add new events like camel racing or a sand castle building competition.

7) China consumes more Chivas Regal than any other country. In fact, I had some the other night -- mixed with a green tea softdrink. Yup, that's right, Scotch and green tea. Sounds disgusting, but was surprisingly tasty.

8) I now have CNN. But... if something comes on that the Chinese government isn't too happy about, the screen goes blank for a few seconds. I'd give you an example of what those topics are but I want this email to make it to you. :)

That's it for now, my pets. I have to do a little writing for my interview tomorrow. The topic: what CCTV is doing well, how it can improve, and how I can help. ugh...

Miss you all!
Angela