Monday, October 31, 2005

Today's the day!

My shuttle picks me up at 2pm to take me to Washington Dulles airport. By 8am EST time here in the States (tomorrow), I'll be touching down in the land of windmills, tulips, and wooden shoes.

I'm sorry to those of you I couldn't see before I left. It's been crazy getting everything organized and I simply ran out of time. I guess now you'll just have to come on over to Europe and take a little vacation.

I have to say, I feel absolutely fantastic. I finally feel like I'm beginning a new life. This is probably the most a person can get a fresh clean start -- sell your old stuff, move to a new country, have a new relationship -- and it's exactly what I needed to move on.

Friday, October 28, 2005

oh wait. i just remembered.

My soup of the day...

pumpkin... it had black pepper... it was a bit creamy... mmmm.... yummy.

(little bit of a joke there folks)

I just said goodbye to a very dear... very close... very special friend of mine.

This friend was like a vice... like a drug... like crack... or heroin... chocolate... or alcohol. He made me feel so good and yet I knew... this is wrong. I knew I should stop this.

And now we have.

I'm letting go of all of my old life.

I am new. Life is new.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

The Nefertiti bust I got in Berlin did not go to auction. I still have it. This makes me stupidly happy. I find that the things I saved from the sale are the things I really, really love and that I'm willing to transport over an ocean. I repeat: I will NOT buy another thing unless I love it so much I'm willing to bubble wrap it, lift it, and pay to ship it.

Friday, October 21, 2005

TODAY (insert trumpets bleating triumphantly here) IS THE LAST DAY (EVER!) I WILL WAITRESS!!!

Oh thank god, it's almost over. I will never -- repeat -- never wait tables again.

Though... I do have to say... in some weird, bizarro way... there is a sense of satisfication you get when you do a good job waiting on a table. Everything is immediate. You understand you're doing a good job right away (ah yes, got their drinks down, now get salads, okay perfect timing, right, here comes their food.) If the people are cool, then they appreciate you right away too. (thank you so much -- big smile -- you were great) And then of course, the money is immediate. (wahoo... they left me a 30% tip. wow.)

It's a similar feeling as when I was teaching English in China. (and it's so noticeable because it's so incredibly dissimilar from my job as a TV producer) When I did a good job teaching my students, they were immediately appreciative. And I got to see my results right away. (oh good... I taught them how to pronounce their "l's" -- there goes being able to make them sing Deck the Halls and getting a good laugh out of it)

I wonder if I could get Discovery Channel to start writing thank you notes for a job well done? Maybe National Geographic could start tipping producers who get their shows delivered on time?

Monday, October 17, 2005

Need a rich boyfriend/girlfriend??? Go to www.sugardaddie.com

One of my girlfriends in China told me about this website. She has no problem using her large and fantastic ta tas to hook a rich guy. In fact, she's already found a rich Chinese guy who wants to back her tourism business.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

I pulled a muscle in my neck waitressing. This might be the lamest injury I've ever gotten.

On the upside of life, I made a bundle from the auction of my things.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Day 18

All of my earthly possessions are now out of storage and in my parents garage/living room. My parents are thrilled.

Well, not everything. Some of my things are also on the slow boat to The Netherlands. I sent the first package almost a month ago and it has yet to reach its destination. I have this horrible fear that everything will be lost and I'll have no shoes. Just about everything else is replaceable, but man... I love those shoes.

Got rid of my car today. Donated some stuff to Goodwill. Took other things to an online auction business to be sold on Ebay. Rough day. Not easy to part with some of these belongings but I know it must be done. My ex told me one time that maybe he got over things (me? our marriage? our divorce?) faster than me because he didn't have to be around our stuff and constantly reminded of our everyday life together. Yippee for him. Yes, this is tough to sift through all of it. Wish I could've walked away too and taken the easy way out.

Yes, this is bitter. And yes, this is how I'm feeling today.

Friday, October 07, 2005

Today is DAY 24 until I leave. My departure date is rapidly approaching and as it gets closer I find my emotions are swinging wildly between extreme excitement and anxiety about what my new life will be like. (and maybe throw in a dash of mourning for my past married life... you'd think after 2 years I'd be over this, but I find that I'm not. Maybe I never will be.)

I spoke with Randy -- the guy who auctioned off my belongings -- and he informed me that he sold some of my furniture incomplete. Namely, my dining room table was sold without the glass. (which as you can imagine greatly reduces the value) This absolutely infuriates me because this was the one item that I thought I'd get some money for. And when he was picking up my things, I asked him twice if he had the glass. Both times he said yes. I was so upset after I spoke to him that I just couldn't let it rest. I called him back and gave him an earful about how disappointed I was that he didn't even call me to tell me the glass was missing. He promptly blamed me for not noticing that he didn't have the glass in his truck. Huh? How the hell am I supposed to know when I keep asking him and keeps telling me he has it?

I know it's just stuff and I shouldn't get so upset. But really this auction means money for me and Martijn and our new life together.

I have no idea how much I've made from the sale. I'm supposed to call today to find out, but I'm nervous that the number is going to be really low.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Random moments from the past few days:

I just finished making the money I need to meet all of my financial obligations to go to The Netherlands. I'm now in "saving mode" again and it feels very good.

One of our regulars at the restaurant (which, by the way, is considered to be one of the nicest in the area) cupped one of my buttcheeks (twice) and grabbed one of my breasts the other night. The owner yelled at him and he stormed out. However, he wasn't kicked out forever which is what I think should happen. (right after I punch him in the gut for being such a pig) I should've gone and worked at a strip joint. I would've made more money and been less shocked when I got touched.

Looks like the ex and I will not be seeing each other. He didn't say "no" or anything. He just didn't say... er... anything. Oh well. I will never try to contact him again. Period. End of story. New life. New love. Move on.

Got new pictures of friends' babies and they made ovaries ache. Sigh...

Have found I'm moving back into a "nesting" mode. Want to paint walls and bake pies and such. Wierd. Maybe it's the upcoming enforced housewife period I'm about to enter. I have no choice but to nest. :)

Still have moments of panic about the move, but the joy I'm feeling overpowering the nerves. Good thing.